A New, Holistic Definition of ‘Strong’
Let’s face it
Aren’t you tired to compete with your male coworkers, just to show your boss you are equally ‘good’? Well, this is not what it means to be a strong woman. As someone who has been often called ‘strong as a man’, I have felt the pressure of gender competition my entire life. However, such pressure and competition should not exist in the first place.
Indeed, whilst men and women share many qualities and deserve the same rights, they also differ largely in nature and genetics. Most importantly, men’s internal clocks are designed to work within a daily circadian rhythm, while women have a 28-day cyclical internal clock. For this reason, comparing men and women’s performances on a daily basis is a mistake; on the other hand, a monthly comparison would be a much fairer option.
Even more than this, if women neglect their cyclical nature – and strive to compare themselves with men all month long – they will end up renouncing their biggest strength. But what does it mean, therefore, to be a strong woman? To answer this question, we will have to provide a new, holistic, definition of ‘strength’. And to do so, we will have to go through some brief genealogy of modern masculinity and femininity.
What defines ‘strong’?
When you look up ‘strong’ on Google dictionary, here are the definitions that come up:
- ‘having the power to move heavy weights or perform other physically demanding tasks’;
- ‘able to withstand force, pressure, or wear’ (italics added).
As it emerges clearly, physicality is the main characteristic of strength. But is it the only one?
Can we redefine ‘strong’?
For as much as I dislike using the word ‘patriarchy’ and adhering to an exclusively feminist narrative, I don’t know of any better ways to put it: history has been written by men. And both our grammar and thinking pay the consequences of it. However, masculinity itself has been scrutinised and challenged over the past 30 years, and this process has had a relevant impact on the notion of ‘strength’.
In the early 90’s, American post-Jungian poet Robert Elwood Bly (Bly 1990), analyst Robert Moore and mythologist Douglas Gillette (Moore & Gillette 1990), became the main advocates of the so-called ‘mythopoetic men’s movement‘. The objective of the movement was to challenge the traditional notion of ‘masculinity’, all centred on physicality and violence. By so doing, men would be enabled to reconnect with forgotten qualities, such as wisdom and care, and reclaim their so-called ‘mature’ masculinity.
At the same time, new definitions of femininity also made their appearance in the 90’s (most notably thanks to Clarissa Pinkola Estés), claiming the same rights: a more comprehensive, less stereotypical idea of femininity. Both notions of masculinity and femininity initiated a new debate on strength: can strength be more than just physically strong?
Focus, Discipline, Resilience and Caring
If you have read my Brainz Magazine articles, ‘What Is Tridimensional Strength and Why Should you Develop it?‘ and ‘5 Steps To Reconnect With Your Inner Warrior And Win Your Fear of Failure‘, you know that a more accurate definition of strength incorporates mental and emotional aspects, such as: focus, discipline, resilience, honour, moral integrity and mental fortitude. In addition to these, compassion and self-compassion are worth including. These refer to the ability to connect with both others and oneself at an emotional level.
Albeit relevant to both men and women, a new definition of ‘strength’ will mostly benefit women, as we shall see in a bit.
What Makes a Woman ‘Strong’, Then?
Let’s go back to the cyclical nature of women
As already pointed out, women’s physical, mental, emotional and social strengths vary over the course of their menstrual cycle. Here is exactly how:
- Menstrual Phase (Inner Winter). In this phase, basal body temperature (BBT) and physical energy are low, whilst introspection, long-term planning and emotional connection are highest;
- Follicular Phase (Inner Spring). BBT is still low, however, due to increased physical and mental energy, women can excel at medium-term planning, marketing skills, physical strength and skill practice;
- Ovulatory Phase (Inner Summer). BBT is now high, and energy is peaking. Women have the highest physical energy, social skills, short-term planning, physical, mental and emotional endurance;
- Luteal Phase (Inner Autumn). BBT is very high, however, physical energy and social skills are running low. In this phase, women have high emotional connection and care ability, and highest organisational skills (e.g. decluttering, reviewing and revising, etc.).
Different ‘strengths’ across the month
When we replace the old definition of ‘strength’ with a new one that includes mental, emotional and social components, women can be ‘strong’ all month long. In fact, women can be physically and mentally strong around follicular and ovulatory phases; they can connect emotionally with themselves in the menstrual phase, and with others in the luteal phase; they can perform challenging social tasks (like closing deals, meetings and trips) around ovulation time; and they are best suited to review, revise and declutter in the luteal phase.
To Conclude
Strong men and strong women
Whilst both men and women’s hormones fluctuate over the month, hormonal fluctuations affect women in much greater measure than men. By virtue of this, a woman’s ‘strength’ shifts continuously from physical to mental, through emotional and social. Therefore, a ‘strong’ woman is a woman who is:
- connected with her emotions in the menstrual phase;
- engaged in goal-setting and planning, as well as in physical strength and skill practice, in the follicular phase;
- wiling to give her best physically, mentally and socially in the ovulatory phase;
- able to connect with, and take care of others in the luteal phase.
Interested in learning more?
Do you want to learn more about how your hormones affect your performance, and how you can organise your monthly schedule to work with your cycle? Would you like to know what foods to eat and what workouts to do in each phase, to be your strongest self all month long? Do you need recipe ideas to support your hormones? Do you want to get rid of cramps and migraines for good?
Join my Masterclass here and learn to work ‘with the flow’, not against it. Looking forward to seeing you there!
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References
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